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If a donut falls on the ground and you pick it up.. that's a squat right / Kitchen Towel
I like to cook with wine. Sometimes I even put it in my food.
The dentist said I needed a crown. (crown image) I was like I know, right?!The dentist said I needed a crown. (crown image) I was like I know, right?!
If life gives you lemons, make lemonade...and then find someone whose life has given them vodka and have a party!
Dear Karma, I have a list of people you forgot.
Underestimate me. That will be fun.
You don't have to attend every argument you are invited toYou don't have to attend every argument you are invited to profile view
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my metabolism the most. / 14"x6" Reclaimed Wood SignOf all the things I've lost, I miss my metabolism the most. / 14"x6" Reclaimed Wood Sign
I do not have ducks. Or a row. I have squirrels, and they're everywhere. / 6"x6" Reclaimed Wood SignI do not have ducks. Or a row. I have squirrels, and they're everywhere. / 6"x6" Reclaimed Wood Sign
If you met my family, you would understand. / 6"x6" Reclaimed Wood SignIf you met my family, you would understand. / 6"x6" Reclaimed Wood Sign
The only reason God didn't make us sisters is because there was no way one mother could handle both of us. / 6"x6" Reclaimed Wood SignThe only reason God didn't make us sisters is because there was no way one mother could handle both of us. / 6"x6" Reclaimed Wood Sign
Shit creek survivor / 6"x6" Reclaimed Wood SignShit creek survivor / 6"x6" Reclaimed Wood Sign
Where is far, far away and how do I get there? / 10"x10" Reclaimed Wood SignWhere is far, far away and how do I get there? / 10"x10" Reclaimed Wood Sign
I am your mom. Therefore, your argument is invalid. End of story. / 10"x10" Reclaimed Wood SignI am your mom. Therefore, your argument is invalid. End of story. / 10"x10" Reclaimed Wood Sign
I've officially run out of excuses. I will likely be a little late because of who I am as a person / 10"x10" Reclaimed Wood SignI've officially run out of excuses. I will likely be a little late because of who I am as a person / 10"x10" Reclaimed Wood Sign
If at first you don't succeed, try doing it the way your mom told you to in the beginning. / 10"x10" Reclaimed Wood SignIf at first you don't succeed, try doing it the way your mom told you to in the beginning. / 10"x10" Reclaimed Wood Sign
Flowers say I'm sorry. Chanel says I've learned my lesson. / 14"x6" Reclaimed Wood SignFlowers say I'm sorry. Chanel says I've learned my lesson. / 14"x6" Reclaimed Wood Sign
Life would be infinitely better if pinatas magically appeared throughout the day. / 14"x6" Reclaimed Wood SignLife would be infinitely better if pinatas magically appeared throughout the day. / 14"x6" Reclaimed Wood Sign
I'm not a procrastinator. I'm just extremely productive at unimportant things. / 14"x6" Reclaimed Wood SignI'm not a procrastinator. I'm just extremely productive at unimportant things. / 14"x6" Reclaimed Wood Sign
This tote is for hiding all my crap / Natural Tote Bag
I May Be Wrong but I Doubt It / Kitchen Towel
I Saw That Karma / Kitchen Towel
I don't like Morning People.. Or Mornings.. Or People / Kitchen Towel
Being a Trophy Wife is Exhausting / Kitchen Towel
I'm not responsible for what my face does when you talk / Kitchen Towel
I am so glad I was wild & crazy before there were cell phones and evidence / Kitchen Towel
This home runs on love, laughter and inappropriate humor / Kitchen Towel
I need a Tax Person who's not afraid of prison / Kitchen Towel
My kids laugh because they think I'm crazy, I laugh because they don't know it's hereditary / Kitchen Towel
I'm on my second guardian angel. The first quit and is now in therapy / Kitchen Towel